Oh no, Joe is in some trouble now. Herbert was awful, Love was lackluster, and Collins was started even though we knew on Friday he was going to miss the game. This means Joe receives the first strike of the 2026 season. It’s his only free strike, meaning the next one would come with punishment. Aside from this blunder, things just aren’t looking great. Keeper Drake Maye has yet to play a down of football for K1 Speed in the starting lineup, and there are still 3 kickers on this team (as of writing this, newly acquired MHJ might eat one of those spots). This K1 Speed team is phoning it in big time, and is well behind in the nuclear scoring race of the rest of the Gonzalez division. The season may soon become about building to avoid becoming the Skunks next season.

It might be panic time in Washington. Caleb Williams went out sad, DMont cooled all the way off, Achane isn’t getting the numbers we have expected from him, and the general flex rotation this team has is a little desperate, as they started 2 return men this week which ultimately cost them the matchup. 0-2 is a shocking start for this team, but the season is far from over. I still expect this team to be in the fight for the division, but that fight has expanded to all 4 members now that the Sharks and Skunks have gotten on the board first. The season might hinge on the week 7 and 8 divisional back to back vs the Pirates, where both teams will be desperate for divisional victories. What was looking like an odds-on favorite to win the league is now looking like they could miss the playoffs entirely if things continue in this direction. Maybe Curtis will get active in the trade space, where he has worked his magic many times before.

The Pirates are battling multiple curses at once: the most picks curse, which has plagued many teams over the years who chose to stockpile high draft picks, and the commish curse which prohibits a commissioner from winning their own league. Even given these known curses, this doesn’t fully explain the misfortune that has fallen on this team this season so far. Jayden Daniels got to start 2 quarters for the Pirates before destroying his arm again, Saquon went out, DJ Moore was taken off the field while contributing nothing. Even given these injuries, the team put up 154 points which is a much better effort than last week. It wasn’t enough though, as the Skunks surged late behind Davante and Stafford’s huge night. I never expected to be fighting from the back of the rankings, but here we are.

The Dikes lose in week 2 on a heartbreaking injury to Dart. What was looking like a 2-0 start with control of the division quickly turned into a 1-1 start down in the division. I had the Dikes ranked much higher on Monday morning. Injuries were a huge factor but you have to consider karma as well, with Dike being benched for Johnston and Addison who put up a combined 6 points. Dike over either guy wins the matchup even with Dart going down. The lesson is clear, you can’t Dike halfway. This team still has a lot of potential and wins ahead of them, but a lot of momentum was just taken away from them, rightfully or not. They now have to play the hottest team in the league in For(th)ky Down. At least Coker is popping off and Kittle isn’t looking like the worst pick of all time anymore.

The Skunks shocked the league and possibly the nation by upsetting the Pirates behind massive performances from their stack of Stafford and Adams. This team has performed very well so far this season, even better than several teams ranked ahead of them in this article. The Skunks lead their division in scoring and are the highest scoring team in the league outside of the high octane Gonzalez division. They now face GIRTH who is another top offense in a matchup I expected to be between two lower tier teams. The Skunks could vault all the way up the list if they win this week. Their key to winning could be Puka missing another game, as GIRTH holds Puka and the Skunks have seen what happens for Adams when Puka is missing. A quick look at the History page on this site will show you that the franchise record for wins in a season is 6, which is the lowest among all franchises despite being one of the original 8 teams. Curry and Austin just got control mid season last year, but could look to turn around things sooner than anticipated. Getting to 7 wins on the season would be a major milestone, and they just might be able to get there.

Just when I thought I was out, Patrick Mahomes pulls me back in. Bona Vista has arrived to the Johnson divisional conversation in a big way by getting one over on the Orcas. Mahomes was the driving force this week, but Downs Johnson has been huge as well. The rest of the team tho, not really inspiring a ton of confidence. I have to rank the Beer Wolves behind the Orcas because it kinda felt like the Orcas let this one go due to lineup decisions and Bowers not being available. It was looking like a perfect storm for the Beer Wolves when the Dikes were projected to beat Sacks, but now the divisional back to back vs the Sacks in weeks 7 and 8 will likely decide both team’s fate. I expect that the Beer Wolves will remain relevant in the playoff conversation, but I don’t view them as a title contender at this point.

This team has a lot of guys, but those guys just weren’t all started in the right way this week. I still think when Bowers comes back, this team will be a top team again. But since they lose a crucial divisional game early, I have to leave them behind the Sacks. Every divisional matchup going forward will be even more important now that they drop one to Noah. TLaw vs the Browns and TLaw vs the Broncos are two completely different guys. I feel like this team could benefit from player trades, as they could really use more reliable RBs outside of Jeanty, who had a rough week himself. We saw this team’s floor this week without Bowers and it was pretty low. They now face the Pirates in week 3 who badly need a win. If the Orcas can get the job done, it increases their playoff chances significantly.

What was looking like a frustrating loss turned into a lucky win that could springboard this team into the playoff and divisional mix when it’s all said and done. This team has compiled a luck streak through their years in Super League that might never be outdone. But when the luck and divisional record are on your side, you’re incredibly dangerous. Next week, look for Bijan to bounce back, and for the Ravens to be out for blood after dropping a game to the Saints. Sacks in the City is simply a premier franchise in this league and it seems like they’ll always be towards the top half of this ranking each season. Time will tell if this team is a true contender or not, but right now they are a scary proposition for the rest of the league - what would happen if Nathan actually did win a third title?

The Sharks are in the driver’s seat in the Moss division, after being projected to finish last place in the division and bottom of the league. This is a nightmare scenario for the rest of the division, as the Sharks are built to win next year, not this year. The Sharks now play with house money and have the most assets in the league to make their team better if they so choose. It feels like this team’s chances of selling big at the deadline are lessened because of Loveland’s poor start, and the glut of picks acquired was so good that it might be hard to keep making them better. What’s for sure is this front office will maximize this opportunity and will position the team to keep competing this season, even if guys are sold. The Sharks’ engine is truly the duo of Gibbs and Cook, and if they run like this every week, the waters will continue to flow the Sharks way.

The top three of this list is dominated by the Gonzalez division, and for good reason. The top three on this list are the only ones over 300 points on the season. For GIRTH, its led to a 1-1 start, as For(th)ky Down took the divisional lead behind a massive week. Not having Puka hurt, but honestly I’m not sure it would have changed anything this week. GIRTH’s super power is Josh Allen, who has been flat out the best player in football through the first two weeks. Omarion and Laporta had crucial weeks, and flex options Corum and Boston are passing the eye test so far. This team has been through a roller coaster in its short time in Super League so far, and it feels like this season could be exactly that. For now, I have to give credit to the high powered offense than GIRTH has delivered this year, even in a 40 point loss. I think this team has the biggest floor to ceiling range of anyone in the league, as shown by going from 12 to 3 in two weeks.

The Slimes began divisional play by absolutely embarrassing the Joe led franchise by 80+ points. This is what great teams do - they dominate the teams they should dominate. You just hope if you’re a Slimes fan, that these guys have more left in the tank after this one though. Devonta looked a lot more like I thought he would this week, Ferg was absolutely massive, and Christian Watson continued his solid play from Week 1. It’s been all green gravy for this team so far, but I do wonder about the depth. Nabers produced 1 catch and 1 yard this week, and was banged up mid game before returning. Etienne was correctly sat this week, but his volume being ceded to Kamara and Donaldson is concerning. Still though, Amon Ra is such a floor raiser that I have to put aside my concerns for now. This team is primed to make a finals run if they can stay healthy. They still hold the Taco Bell belt as they continue their campaign, and it’s on the line this week against Sacks in the City. If that wasn’t enough incentive, the Sacks knocked the Slimes out of the playoffs last year on their way to a second championship. You gotta think the Slimes will want their lick back.

For some reason there’s a fantasy football team based on the character Forky from Toy Story 4, and for some reason, that team is on top of the best keeper league in the world. This was the one team I nailed in the rankings last week. Jackson and company have delivered an absolutely special first two weeks of the season, burying opponents behind a combination of JSN and Kenneth Walker. When those two average 60 points a week alone, it’s very hard to contend with that. It’s not just the core though, it’s the full gambit that makes this team special. From a great QB duo in Dak and Goff, to flex options that haven’t faltered yet in Malik Washington and Garrett Wilson, and then even more depth to support it. This team almost hit 200 this week and they only had 10 points combined from defense and kicker. This is clearly the best Jackson led team I’ve ever seen, and is a return to form for the original Super League franchise that has been suffering ever since Carter Tracey ran them into the mud. I still don’t know why Forky has his own team, but you really can’t argue with his results. This team will be favored heavily in their next two matchups as well, before the Week 5 Jack-Off.