I am in California, mourning the passing of my grandmother this week. This is going to be brief, but the power rankings must continue no matter what.

-Commish 

Shit Teams 

12.Need for K1 Speed (—)

This team can't catch a break. Just when Joe finally puts up his best week in Super League, he runs into a completely hot Rubber Buckys team that is also having one of their best weeks in franchise history. His latest attempt at trading Josh Jacobs went through, and has provided some needed depth, but Jacobs will be missed. This team will need to start preparing for the toilet bowl as an 0-4 start can only really mean one thing.

11.Parma Pirates (📉-3)

The Pirates looked lost without James Conner. Other than the QBs (who were still mostly mid), only two players reached the 10 point mark this week. The Pirates have some work to do to avoid becoming the Skunks.

10.Washington Fantasy Team (📈+1)

Fantasy Team finally gets on the board, and picks up a game on the Pirates and Sharks in the divisional race in the process as they both lost. There isn't a flashy attack here, but this was a very solid win nonetheless. Still, I don't buy this team as anything but a shit team until these Jets find consistency. This week, they found life against the shitty Dolphins, but what about next week?

Spoiler Teams

9.Rubber Buckys (📈+1)

The Buckys manage to get it back to .500 after putting up a monster week. They now pull within a game of the Sharks in the division (they are down the tiebreaker currently though). Bucky and Dak got their nuts off, and Pittman continued to produce. It's a funky team, but I kinda like em.

8.For(th)ky Down (📈+1)

It looked like For(th)ky Down was in position for the biggest upset of the season so far, but Jackson died via the very thing he loves most: the Denver Broncos. With the Slimes solidifying themselves as a contender, this team finds themselves further in the spoiler territory, despite being a solid team so far. Still, there's a lot of season left, and the way James Cook is running, anything is possible. Divisional matchups will mean everything to this team going forward.

Real Teams

7.The Bridge Road Orcas (📉-2)

The Orcas continue the see-saw in the rankings; back down yet again. They lose to WFT, which significantly hurts their playoff chances in the long run. The Orcas now find themselves in a must-win this week versus For(th)ky Down. There are some moves they could make, but overall they need more firepower if they want to keep up with the best division in SL.

6.Shit Eating Skunks (—)

The Skunks have now taken two straight losses, and two lower-scoring losses. It wouldn't have mattered as much if they did score more this week, as they ran into a red-hot Slimes team. Worse for the Skunks, they have to face the Sharks this week, which looks to be another uphill battle. A hot start has faded, but I think this team still has some juice.

5.SLATTS SLIMES (📈+2)

The Slimes splooged this week, dropping 170 even with Nabers' season-ending injury leaving him with four points. The addition of Josh Jacobs is a huge one, but with Nabers out, the depth will be tested, and depth is exactly what it took to get Jacobs. The fantasy gods giveth and taketh, but the Slimes are still 3-1 and can win the division.

4.Bona Vista Beer Wolves (—)

The Beer Wolves get back on the right track, but I still feel about the same as I did last week. Maybe a little worse honestly. This team has been billed as depth city, but they're thinning out a bit as guys flop and get hurt. The Beer Wolves should be a playoff lock, but I'm starting to question what the ceiling is here, after being an assumed championship favorite. Mike Evans, if you can hear the Wolves, please save them!

3.Sacks In the City (📉-1)

Sacks in the City won a tough matchup that saw franchise cornerstone Lamar Jackson exit the game a bit early. This team did produce despite that, but things will be tested without that QB1 cushion they've relied on as long as he is out. Bijan is as solid as they come right now and would help steady things if he wasn't on BYE next week. The move for DK looks great, but he's also on BYE. They are looking a little thin next week, and the week after that they face the Sharks, so we could see their divisional lead falter. The defending champs will need to show heart to keep their spot in the top three.

2.Zark's Sharks (📉-1)

The Sharks drop a crazy matchup that saw GIRTH take control of the 1st seed. The Sharks still had a great week and I'm not worried about them at all. Egbuka is looking like the pick of the year so far, and Skattebo is right behind him. The bench was very productive this week, looking very deep. The Sharks are cooking despite their first loss of the year.

1.GIRTH (📈+2)

Stop the presses. GIRTH has taken over the power rankings #1 for the first time. I didn't see this coming. They've come in and given two teams their only losses of the year so far, and now grabbed the top spot in the league, and will keep the tie-breaker over the Sharks as long as they do not win the Mickey Mouse Cup. Puka is an engine, and both Hampton and Judkins have caught fire. With over 300 points in the last two weeks, this team is an easy candidate to win it all right now.